Expanding your Presence as a Leader

👋 Hi my name is Roslyn, I’m a 2x founder and executive coach. I help founders fall in love with building their companies again. Learn about working 1:1 here.

Hi there,

I’m excited to share a topic with you that’s been very top of mind for me lately: expanding your presence as a leader through a consistent daily routine. 

I think presence is one of the most underrated leadership qualities. If you think about it, the best leaders you know embody grounded, calm presence. It’s why we trust them and feel safe with them.

I’ve been thinking a lot about how to embody this day-to-day. The truth is, many of us are going through our days with activated nervous systems, with the different parts of us running the show.

One tool I’ve been leaning into more recently is a consistent daily routine. So today I’m going to make the case you might consider creating (or expanding) yours too. 

I’ll cover:

• How the best leaders embody presence

• Why you should consider a daily routine

• How to build, iterate and grow your daily routine

Also, if you’re based in NYC (or visiting!), next Friday September 26th, I’m hosting a female founder coffee walk, to create meaningful conversation and community amongst some incredible founders in the city. 

I would love  for you to join us! We’re going to be talking about what blocks are keeping us from moving forward in our businesses. See more info below and RSVP here.

Where we go deep on the outer work or the inner work of building a startup.

From my perspective, what makes great leaders isn’t having all the answers. It’s not exerting power over people. It’s not being able to predict the future.

When you think of the best leaders you know, I’m going to guess they’re calm, present, and emotionally aware. You trust them instinctively. They make whole rooms feel safe. 

However, I know a lot of founders (myself included at times) that feel chronically activated. Reacting to emails and messages. Switching between tabs. Multi-tasking. Putting out fires. Feeling like they’re running on a treadmill they can’t get off.

When we operate from that state, we unconsciously pass our patterns down to our teams. I once heard someone say that the nervous system of the founder becomes the nervous system of the organization, and that just rang so true to me.

• Your unconscious belief that being busy makes you important creates a “chronically on” culture where people don’t feel they can rest.

• Your need to control to feel safe gets mirrored in how your managers lead.

• Your discomfort with failure fosters a culture where people avoid risk.

• Your aversion to conflict means important but controversial issues are left unsaid.

So maybe you’re thinking: I’d like to be a more grounded, present leader.

How do we cultivate presence?

While there are many ways that I won’t be able to cover in this newsletter edition alone, today I want to talk about simple, transformational tooll: creating a daily routine.

WHY CREATE A DAILY ROUTINE?

The way you start your day shapes how you move through it.

Imagine in the morning communicating to your nervous system: It’s safe. Look at all there is to be grateful for. We have time to take care of our mental, physical and emotional wellbeing, to listen to our inner wisdom. 

That grounded energy will naturally flow into the rest of your day.

Now imagine starting with: THERE’S NO TIME, we need to drink this coffee and open up the laptop FIVE MINUTES AGO!

How do you think the rest of your day is going to feel? Urgent! Reactive! No time to pause! Unsafe!

And how do you think your team will feel in your presence?

Brianna Wiest, in her book 101 Essays That Will Change the Way You Think, writes:

“When you regulate your daily actions, you deactivate your “fight or flight” instincts because you're no longer confronting the unknown. This is why people have such a difficult time with change, and why people who are constant in their habits experience so much joy: simply their fear instincts are turned off long enough for them to actually enjoy something.”

If you don’t believe me (and Brianna) consider these very successful people who credit strict routines as a key to their performance:

Warren Buffett – Keeps a consistent daily rhythm: simple breakfast at McDonald’s, hours of reading, and very few meetings. He sees routine as a way to preserve energy for high-quality decisions.

Oprah Winfrey – Starts her mornings with meditation, exercise, and affirmations, which she credits with grounding and fueling creativity.

Serena Williams – Built her tennis career on deeply structured training routines that included repeatable rituals.

Stephen King – Writes every morning, even on holidays, with a set word count goal, describing it as a ritual that triggers creativity.

And then there’s me. I’m not at their level of success (yet), but I can say from experience that deepening my morning routine has drastically improved my energy, mood and productivity.

So how do you create one?

8 STEP FOR DEVELOPING A DAILY ROUTINE

1. CREATE SPACE FOR IT

Create space for it — physically and in your schedule. A cozy corner of your couch, a yoga mat with a candle, maybe even a small altar if that feels aligned.

Personally I make a warm drink, light a candle (in the winter) and journal on the couch. That signals to my brain “morning routine time”.

Also decide when in your day you’re going to practice. I personally love the morning time, right after waking up and before work, so that it sets the tone for my day. But if morning don’t work for you, try evenings or even a mid-day break.

2. EXPERIMENT

Try out practices that help you reflect, feel gratitude, connect with yourself, open to your inner wisdom or make you feel more in flow with your life force: meditation, breathwork, yoga, Qi Gong or Muay Thai, light stretching, journaling, creative writing, Morning Pages, dancing, chanting, singing or playing an instrument, walking in nature, gratitude and self-compassion practices, intention-setting, reading a spiritual book, listening music, drawing, creating art in any form (or whatever calls to you!).

Give a couple of practices a try and see what feels good to you.

3. COMMIT 

Decide on a cadence and timeframe you’re going to try this out for. Maybe:

• 30-45 mins in morning, 5 days/week

• 15 minutes on a daily walk 

• 10 minutes every night before bed

Show up for yourself. No shame if you miss a day — just keep practicing.

4. OBSERVE

Notice the changes. Journal about moments where you’ve felt more grounded, less reactive or more present.

5. GROW 

As you see positive changes, or come to look forward to your routine, you may want to expand it. When I was in the founder role at my last company, I’d usually take under 20 minutes a day. These days, I often take at least an hour because of the positive impact I see on my energy, inspiration and presence. I used to worry about digging into my to-do list time. Now I understand it unlocks my best work, wisdom and wellbeing, and so I carve out time for it. 

6. ITERATE AND EVOLVE

Try switching things up every so often. If you find you’re dreading your routine, try something else instead. Notice what you’re drawn to. Notice what feels energizing. There are no rules. I used to not like meditation. I used to find meditation frustrating, so I didn’t look forward to my morning routine as a result. I played around with other practices and found that breathwork and Parts Work work better for me and help me deepen into more meditative states.

7. CREATE YOUR TOOLKIT

Over time you’ll come to understand how different practices serve you. Feeling stuck? Try a movement practice. Loud inner critic? Go for a self-compassion tool. Feeling inspired? How about a creative expression practice. Learn what you need to shift or lean into the mood you’re in.

8. INTEGRATE INTO YOUR DAY

As you learn what tools are working for you, you may wish to start sprinkling them in throughout the rest of your day. Love how calm breathwork leaves you feeling? Maybe you can try a shorter version before meetings. If music supports your journaling, play during work too.

That’s it! Simple, but powerful.

Give it a try, notice how your presence expands and your life changes.

I’m excited for you. If you’re feeling inspired, check out the reflection questions below.

1. How do I want to feel as I move through my day and how can my routine help me cultivate that?

2. Which practices feel nourishing, joyful, or aligned with the person I want to become?

3. What intention do I want to set for showing up consistently?

4. How can I frame my commitment as a gift to myself, not just another task?

I’m excited to be hosting the first of a series of Female Founder Walks next Friday, September 26th, starting in the West Village.

My goal with these walks is create space where purpose-led founders can learn from one another, connect deeply and feel supported through the demanding, soul-expanding journey of building a business.

Each walk will have a discussion theme and this one is around blocks. We’ll be chatting about:

• As we move into Q4, how do you want to move forward in your business? What would feel like meaningful progress or alignment for you?

• ​What blocks do you feel are keeping you from moving in that direction?

• ​How does this block tend to show up day-to-day, in your energy, focus, or the way you lead?

• ​If this block were trying to protect you from something, what might that be?

• ​If you imagine this block lifted, what becomes possible for you and your team?

Deep & meaningful chats + coffee + movement outside sound fun?

You can find out more about the event and RSVP here.

• 1:1 Coaching: I want to help you fall in love with building your company again. Book a free coaching consultation to learn how we’ll work together on this.

• Group Coaching: Click here to stay in the know on when our next Within Group Coaching cohort launches.

• Let’s be friends: on LinkedIn and Instagram. I share more startup content and what’s going on behind the scenes there.

• Finally, tell me how you liked this newsletter. I read every piece of feedback.

Appreciate you!

With love,
Roslyn 💚